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Negotiating Mistakes

By Michael Soon Lee, CRS, GRI

Most people would love to be a black belt negotiator but there are five mistakes they make that mark them as raw beginners. Do you do the following:

Mistake #1: Not Doing Your Homework
Before going into a contest a martial artist will always spy on his opponent to find out everything he can about his strengths and weaknesses. Likewise, most negotiations are won or lost before ever sitting down at the bargaining table. How long has the item been for sale, what is the seller’s profit margin and how motivated is the seller can be very valuable information. Much of the knowledge you seek can be easily found on the internet or just by asking around.

Mistake #2: Jumping Into Negotiations Too Soon
A savvy fighter always throws a few jabs to test his opponent before really getting engaged in a contest. Similarly, an experienced negotiator always builds rapport before really beginning to bargain in earnest. Small talk can not only provide valuable information but build rapport with the other party as well. People do business with people they like and they give them better deals as well.

Mistake #3: Shooting At Your Primary Target First
Martial artists know that if they want to hit their opponent in the head you must first act like you really want to hit them in the stomach first to pull their guard down. In the same way, successful hagglers pretend like they are interested in something else before focusing on their real target.
If you really want a two-carat diamond ring ask about a one-carat first to see how negotiable it might be and to learn the negotiating style of the salesperson. Then, walk away and come back later on to bargain in earnest on the ring you really want. Armed with your previous knowledge you have a distinct advantage and the salesperson also knows that if he doesn’t give you a good deal you might walk away again.

Mistake #4: Making The First Offer
Smart negotiators always get the other person to make the first offer because a buyer who throws an offer on the table can only raise their price and a seller who names a price can only lower that figure. By getting your opponent to make the first offer you know that’s their minimum acceptable price. A good negotiator should be able to get them to do even better than that.

Mistake #5: Taking “No” From Someone Who Can’t Say “Yes”
In organizing large martial arts tournaments you often have to deal with managers who cannot commit their fighter to a match but their job is just to screen out people who may not be serious contenders. Similarly, many retail salespeople do not have the ability to negotiate while their manager usually does. Don’t give up on a negotiation until you ask the question, “Who here has the authority to consider my offer?”

Mistake #6: Not Putting The Other Party Under Pressure

Mistake #7: Not Walking Away
In martial arts, some battles are just not worth fighting because the stakes are too low or you just aren’t ready. When bargaining very few deals are so good you can’t walk away and come back later to find the same or an even better offer on the table.

Mistake #8: Turning Your Back
From the time they bow at the beginning until the end of the match martial artists never turn their backs on their opponents. Negotiators shouldn’t either. Unscrupulous people may try to “nibble” or ask for more after the agreement has been sign or use unfair bargaining tactics. Always watch your back.

Mistake #9: Giving Up Too Soon

Mistake #10: Not Congratulating The Other Party

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